Your Heart Is an Empty Womb; No, I Don't Know What That Means Either.

- One topic of conversation recently has been more pushing - this time to get me to speak with my parents about my upbringing and how it has impacted me as an adult. This is not a bad idea on the face of it, but in the past any attempts to do this have been met with various levels of incomprehension. Like, they just can't believe I didn't have an idyllic childhood! I grew up on a 15-acre farm in Northeast Texas. We had 45+ head of goats and bunches of animals! I had dance, art, and music lessons out the ass and never had to deal with "normal school drama". How ungrateful can you be? And, writing that out, I can sort of see their point. It was a unique experience that I value a lot but also had a very hard time with feeling connected and like my validity as a person was based almost exclusively on complying with religious norms. They were in a cult. They kind of still are? We got spanked. They still think that's okay as evidenced by some of the things they say about my daughter. Anyway, I'm a bit exasperated by conversations in which there's a touch of: "This is a problem. What are you doing about it?!" Bestie, what do you think I've been doing in therapy for the last decade? Jesus the Christ Child.

- Oh! Okay. So one of the quirky customers at my job (6 shifts left. Eeee.) has their pickup name as Julie Newmar. At first I thought it was a reference to Catwoman. Because, as you know, that's the name of the actress who played Catwoman in the 60s. Well, I finally asked about it the other day, and guess what? It's a reference to To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar which is even better! She said I was the only person who's every gotten the reference and asked me if I've seen the Australian version. Priscilla Queen of the Desert? Heck yes I have! After this conversation the 17-year-old I was working with asked me, "What's that?" So I explained briefly. They didn't care. But I got curious. Did anybody else in my queer-&-trans-friendly workplace know about this landmark piece of queer cinema? Nobody else I asked that day did. So now I'm on a quest to find out why this gap in their respective educations exists. Why is it the 38-year-old pansexual but hetero-passing white lady who's read Quentin Crisp and loves To Wong Foo and Priscilla, Shortbus and Strangers In Paradise, Psycho Beach Party and John Waters?

- I have not, though (and should), read Audre Lorde. Note to self.

- Still having girls' nights every night d/t S being out of town. It's been pretty quiet and nice. The meds are settling. I went to restorative yoga on Wednesday which just meant reclining in a dark room and receiving a sound bath for an hour. Highly recommend!