Tuesday, May 7, 2013

4.48 Asscosis

The thing about doing a play about depression, psychosis and suicide is that it brings your coping mechanisms to the fore.  Sometimes that coping is outed as a propensity to turn everything and vulgar and ass oriented.

Sometimes it manifests as an interest in stories of past lives.

I used to watch It's a Wonderful Life obsessively as a small child.  I abruptly stopped around age 4.  I have no memory of doing this.  And even watching the movie these days doesn't "ring a bell", as it were.  See what I did there?

But, you know, the whole movie was a massive, classic near-death experience.

I had imaginary friends; I think they were named Frank and Jerry or Jerry and Riley.  I don't really remember very well. I know that they were there in California and for part of Texas.  But they vanished sometime around age 5.

I feel as though I died of drowning in a past life.

I feel as though I was pregnant in a past life.

I feel as though hands and/or feet were amputated somehow in a past life.

I have a friend or two I think I knew in a past life.  Maybe my mother.  No more than that so far as I know.

People consistently seem afraid of me, or like me a lot.  Or both.

I wish I knew more.  It's quite difficult to say what with the sheer amount of stimulus one has in a life.  Especially in these times.

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